Opposite Action in Action

Saturday’s are busy days for my family. My SO, Bonus Daughter, and myself go to karate. Our dojo is about an hour away, depending on traffic. We travel the furthest of any of the other students, I think. It’s good for us. I love the martial art. It’s not just exercise. There’s history, tradition, and mental wellness connected to the style. I’ll probably do a post concerning the history behind it another day.

We missed the last two week’s off class due to illness and mental health issues. So today was necessary. Just to be clear. We do karate more than once a week: we attend private lessons midweek with other sensei’s. But our main dojo and instructor are at the Saturday classes. It’s so easy to miss something that happens weekly.

Anyone that’s a parent can attest to how hard it is to wrangle a child. Getting yourself dressed, prepared, and out the door is hard enough with mental health issues. Then factoring in my SO and Bonus Daughter adds to the difficulty. Side quests always pop up and delay things. (Nerd joke.) Today’s side quest involved Bonus Daughter hurting herself.

Technically, it was a minor wound. Our orange cat can be very rambunctious when you rile him up. Like most cats, running your hands and feet under the covers gets him excited. Cat owners know what I mean. It’s that moment when their eyes dilate and any reasonable person would know now is the time to let the feline chill. Children do not have that awareness. This resulted in Bonus Daughter getting scratched in the face.

Cat scratches. Not incredibly horrible injuries, right? It does suck that it’s on the face and we know we definitely needed to care for them to prevent scarring. But here’s the kicker. Bonus Daughter has a “beauty pageant” in 3 days. I say that with quotes because this event is just a small event at the County Fair. No skills involved, her age group just walks across stage in high heels and a fluffy dress, waving in a sassy manner. Bonus Daughter has ranted and raved about doing this for weeks. She had even considered sitting out karate class because she worried she might get bruised before the event. She was already fretting about a minor scar on her back that she was going to cover with make up. Needless to say, her meltdown about facial injuries was epic.

Thankfully Opposite Action came to the rescue this morning! Sadness: If you’re feeling down, approach, don’t avoid the situation you’re upset with. Similar to dealing with fear, you want to build mastery over your emotion. Don’t isolate yourself from others—get out and do something to keep yourself busy! Getting out the door and on the road makes it even easier. Remind yourself, I’ve already started the activity, might as well at least see it to the end.

As a special treat, after class, we ended up going to grab a very tasty lunch at the local Chinese Buffet. (Huzzah for COVID restrictions being lifted in our area!) Practicing mindful eating is always a bonus activity when I’m eating out. I need to practice is a lot more, but it’s one part of DBT I haven’t really delved deep into yet. I do feel like you add a level of pressure to the predicament when you’re eating out with others. You want to remain engaged with your eating companions while being aware of the food you’re partaking in.

Saturdays almost always involve a midafternoon crash on my part. I love going out and I love doing a martial art with my family. I just don’t always have enough energy to sustain the momentum all day long. I brought the mail in, took a nap, and woke up to realize one of my self bought treats had arrived. I thought I’d ordered a flower crown, but the item seems a bit different.

This lovely piece came from Amazon. I linked it so you can see the product photos as well. Obviously, now that it’s arrived, I realize I didn’t look at the listing as closely as I should have. I still love it. It’s purpose? Nothing practical, obviously. A confidence booster? Maybe. I’ve fiddled with it a bit and realize I’ll either need some hair pins or some ribbon to fasten it to my noggin securely.

I feel so cute! Like I’m ready to go prance through a meadow like a Disney Princess and sing about kissing my True Love. Always remember to treat yourself! I keep seeing this quote floating around the internet:

“None of us are getting out of here alive, so please stop treating yourself like an after thought. Eat the delicious food. Walk in the sunshine. Jump in the ocean. Say the truth you’re carrying in your heart like hidden treasure. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. There’s no time for anything else.”

I always find my own self-care to be an after thought. It’s a struggle I’m always fighting to acknowledge. So something small like this flower crown is definitely worth the splurge. Any who, thank you for reading my little ramble, guys. Your presence here is appreciated! I always feel warm and fuzzy when I get an alert that someone liked my post.

Published by Erin Seto

Southern Peach 🍑, in her 30’s - Artist 🎨 + Bibliophile 📚 + Geek 🎮 + Nerd 👓 + Animal-Lover 🐾 + Bipolar Disorder 💢 x Anxiety 😨 x PTSD 💣÷ DBT Therapy ✨ + Mental Health Matters 🧠 = ME 👩🏽

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